


head over heels

by hitmyheart



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Mark Lee (NCT) is Whipped, Mutual Pining, Tooth-Rotting Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-29
Updated: 2019-05-29
Packaged: 2020-03-29 09:12:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,337
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19016869
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hitmyheart/pseuds/hitmyheart
Summary: “I miss you,” Mark says to Donghycuk, only it comes out, “You're getting fat.”“I love you,” he says again, only it comes out, “You're still heavy.”Alternatively:Mark is the one who tells the world that he doesn’t miss Donghyuck. He isn’t in love with him. But he is also the one who secretly steals Donghyuck's sweater and sniffs it like a creep just to feel him close.





	head over heels

**Author's Note:**

> hello, it's me again xD idk about this story but i need to satisfy my need. hope you guys enjoy it <3

* * *

 

“Dude, you look like shit.”

Mark scowled at Johnny and ignored his remark. He walked past him to grab a mug from the cupboard and poured himself black coffee. He walked back to the table and settled himself across Johnny. He grabbed a crispy toast on the table and spread strawberry jam on top of it. He bit it harshly, making some of the crumbs fell on the surface of the table and some on his old crumpled T-shirt.

“Did you sleep on the wrong side of the bed?”

“Shut up, hyung,” Mark grumbled, taking another big bite of his toast, munching it loudly.

Johnny let out a small chuckle. It was a very amusing sight to see. Mark's hair was sticking out everywhere. He didn't bother to smooth it down. There was a permanent scowl on his face, his eyebrows furrowed, his lips pressed into a straight line. Mark had to squint when he looked at Johnny because he didn't wear his glasses. He was clearly pissed over something and in a very, very bad mood.

“Mark, is that black coffee?”

Taeyong who just entered the kitchen let out a small gasp as he watched Mark gulped down his black coffee as if he was drinking water.

“Are you okay?” Taeyong asked, worry evident on his voice. He took a seat next to Mark, scanning him.

People know that Mark wasn't fond of that black strong liquid. He preferred something sweet, like iced choco, cappuccino, or bubble tea. He only drank coffee when he was in dire need to force his system to work.

“I'm fine, hyung,” Mark let out another grumble, not liking the attention that was directed to him.  “Don't worry about me.”

“He's fine, Taeyongie,” Johnny chimed in, waving his hand in dismissal as he flipped his newspaper. “He just misses Donghyuck is all.”

“Johnny hyung, I said shut up!”

Taeyong glared at the younger boy.

“Mark Lee, language.”

“I'm fine, okay?” he whined. “I just need to drink coffee to stay awake because I didn't sleep last night.”

“Did you stay up late again to write songs?”

“More like he didn't sleep because he couldn't stop thinking of his Donghyuck.”

“That's it,” Mark slammed his already empty mug on the table, throwing a menacing look at Johnny. “I'm leaving.”

Mark got up from his seat and left the table, but not before throwing another glare at Johnny who smirked back at him in triumph.

“Stop teasing him, Johnny,” Taeyong said after Mark was out of their sight. “It must be really hard for him being away from Donghyuck for almost a month now.”

Johnny scoffed. “He's being ridiculously stupid, Taeyongie. I told that kid to call Donghyuck or come to his house if he misses him that much. It would make things so much easier for him. We all know that he's practically dysfunctional without Donghyuck but he's just too prideful and still in constant denial.”

Taeyong sighed. Well, Johnny wasn't wrong. Mark had been acting weird after Donghyuck left the dorm for his recovery. The magnae of the group had sprained his ankles and had to halt all of his activities with the group. The members were sad but Mark was devastated. The pair were never been separated ever since the training days. Except for that one time when Mark had to go back to Vancouver for a week to visit his parents. They were always together. When there was Mark, there was also Donghyuck. Vice versa.

The day when Donghyuck had to go home, Mark didn't send him off. He went to the Dream's dorm instead and locked himself in his and Donghyuck's shared room. Jaemin found him later that day, curling up into a ball on the bed and clutching Donghyuck's sweater on his chest. Mark didn't cry but his eyes were glossy and red. Jaemin was the one who got Mark out of the room and treated him ice cream to cheer the ex-leader up.

Mark had specifically told Jaemin to get him green tea ice cream that night, which made Jaemin smiled knowingly at him. Mark despised green tea flavor but it was Donghyuck's favorite. If it was his way to cope up, then Jaemin gladly let him. Mark almost threw up finishing that green tea ice cream but in the end, he managed to eat them all.

Mark was getting worse with each day that passed by but he still refused to admit his feelings. There weren’t much the members could do to help him because the reason why Mark was suffering was because of his own stupid pride.

 

* * *

 

 

“Mark, did you ever change your clothes?”

Mark who was sprawling out on the bed while scrolling down his phone looked up to see Doyoung was looking at him with furrowed eyebrows. His nose scrunched up in distaste.

“What?”

Doyoung pointed at the bright yellow sweater. “You've been wearing that for the last two weeks, Mark. _Two weeks_. Don't you have another sweater? It started to smell, too.”

Mark sniffed his sweater and looked back at Doyoung, offended.

“No, it's not,” he denied, “I only wear this to sleep. It doesn't smell bad. It smells like...like...”

“Donghyuck,” Doyoung finished it for the younger boy, rolling his eyes at him. “It smells like him, I know. I get that you miss him—“

“I do not—“

Mark was so ready to defend himself but Doyoung glared at him so hard that it made him cowered and closed his mouth instantly.

“There's this thing called phone, text message, internet, and all that stuff. Donghyuck is just one call away. You can just call him if you miss him.”

Mark let out a huff.

“I don’t miss Donghyuck.”

The judgmental look that Doyoung threw at Mark stabbed the latter at the heart, but he ignored it.

Mark Lee did not miss Lee Donghyuck. He did not miss his ugly face, his stupid laughter, his annoying antics, and he certainly did not miss his creepy smile. Mark was perfectly content even if he didn't see Donghyuck for almost two months now. And no, he wasn’t counting. He just knew. His life was back to peaceful and quiet again like how it used to be before he came to Seoul almost a decade now.

No certain brown haired boy with a slim waist and loud voice who barged into his room at three in the morning just because he wanted to sleep in Mark's bed. No smell of fruity perfume with a hint of sunflowers around him. The air was clear, almost dull. No certain boy with puppy-eyed like who always appeared out of nowhere and clung to him like a koala. This was what Mark had always wanted; peacefulness and personal space. He couldn't ask for more, could he?  

Mark did not miss Donghyuck even when the boy was pretty much the only thing he could think about before he went to sleep and when he opened his eyes first thing in the morning.

“I don’t miss Donghyuck,” Mark mumbled again to himself, his voice was low and sounded uncertain now.

Doyoung heard him and scoffed.                                                              

“Whatever, Mark. Just continue to deny it and suffer at your own risks.”

 

* * *

 

 

“Donghyuck is coming back.”

Mark almost spilled his drink but he managed to grip his cub. But he did choke on his sandwich when Taeyong announced the news to the whole group. He coughed loudly and Jaehyun who sat next to him laughed at his reaction as he patted his back gently.

Mark stared at Taeyong, his eyes were blown wide.

“He’s coming back?” he asked after he stopped coughing. “When?”

Taeyong looked back at him, clearly amused.

“Next week.”

Mark couldn’t help the whine that escaped his lips. It made the whole room broke into laughter, making Mark blushed in embarrassment.

“Mark, you’re so whipped that isn’t funny anymore.”

Mark turned to Yuta and frowned at him. He opened his mouth to say something but Jaehyun interrupted him.

“If you’re going to deny it, you’d better come up with something that makes sense. We’re tired of hearing the same thing over and over again.”

“What are you talking about?”

The whole group, eight of them, turned to Mark and gave him _a look_. Mark felt instantly small under their knowing gaze. They looked at him as if he had grown two heads. Mark refused to knowledge the obvious meaning behind their expression and decided to ignore it. He ducked his head down and chewed his sandwich again, munching it slowly.

After the dinner was over, Mark lingered behind and waited until the other members left the kitchen before approaching Taeyong who was washing the dishes.

“Hyung,” he called, standing next to him. “Is he really going to join our first concert in Seoul?”

Taeyong turned to Mark and raised one of his eyebrows at him.

“He? Who’s he?”

Mark pressed his lips together. “Donghyuck.”

Taeyong chuckled.

“Yes, he is,” he said. “He will be joining us but since he still can’t work properly, he will only appear for some stages. If you want to know more, why don’t you ask him directly?”

Mark immediately looked away.

“I will eventually find out anyway.”

“Right,” Taeyong deadpanned. “Do whatever you want, Mark.”

Mark just nodded grimly and left the kitchen. Taeyong let out a sigh. He didn’t understand why Mark tried so hard to deny his own feelings. At this point, everyone was already aware of his feelings to Donghyuck. It wasn’t hard to figure it out anyway.

Mark always denied that he didn’t miss Donghyuck but he also the one who never left Donghyuck’s bed. He never slept at his own room again ever since Donghyuck left the dorm. He still wore Donghyuck’s sweater to sleep and re-watched The Proposal thrice this week—a movie he’d watched with the smaller before.

Once Jungwoo pranked Mark by telling the latter that he’d washed the sweater and all hell broke loose. Mark’s face turned red and he went into a rage. Before he could lunge forward at Jungwoo, Johnny and Jaehyun quickly dragged him away.

The good news, the sweater was still tucked safely inside Mark’s bag. It still smelled like Donghyuck when Mark sniffed it and the smell of Donghyuck, though slowly fading, immediately calmed him down. After that day, Mark never let anyone go near his bag. And Jungwoo didn’t dare to repeat his mistake again.

 

* * *

 

Mark stood frozen on his place, barely blinking. He opened his mouth to say something but closed it again, gaping like a fish. He'd imagined this scene countless time before. He'd been practicing his speech; what should he say to Donghyuck when the smaller finally came back to the dorm. But now that Donghyuck was here, right in front of his eyes, his brain short-circuited. He couldn't think of anything else as he took in the sight of Donghyuck. He swallowed thickly, eyes following his every movement, not wanting to miss a single detail ever. Someone pushed him forward, Mark could barely register who it was, and suddenly, he was right in front of Donghyuck.

Donghyuck stared at Mark.

Mark stared back at Donghyuck.

This is it, Mark thought as he looked into Donghyuck's big eyes. It was the right time to let out everything that had been bugging him.

“Hi, Mark hyung,” Donghyuck greeted him first and Mark almost cried right there because it had been a while since the last time he listened to his voice. And he smiled, the kind of smile that instantly brightened Mark's day, chasing the nightmare away. His lips stretched upward, showcasing his cute teeth. God, he missed Donghyuck so much he was going crazy.

Mark opened his mouth, ready to tell him just how much he missed him that he felt like losing his mind, only it came out, “You're getting fat.”

The smile on Donghyuck's face fell and Mark wanted to bury himself six feet under the ground and never came back again. Someone snickered and it sounded like Johnny, but before Mark could turn to see who it was, a hand smacked the back of his head; loud and hard.

“Aw!” Mark screamed in pain and held the back of his head where it stung. He turned around and the protest died down on his throat when he looked at Taeil's disapproving look.

“That isn't very nice to say, Mark,” Taeil scolded him gently and Mark wanted to die now. He knew it wasn't nice. He knew it was very rude of him to say. He wasn't supposed to say anything like that. He was supposed to say another thing but his brain just won't cooperate with him.

“It's fine, Taeil hyung,” Donghyuck said, not looking at Mark. “Can you please help me to go to my room? My feet hurt.”

Taeil was on Donghyuck's side in an instant and picked him up into his arms, carrying him bridal style. Mark almost seethed when he saw that. His nostrils flared up as he watched Taeil wrapped his arms around Donghyuck's waist. His head hurt when he watched Donghyuck wrapped his arms around Taeil's neck, resting his head on the latter's shoulder. He gritted his teeth together, his jaw clenching. But he didn't move from his spot, still standing in the middle of the living room like a coward he was.

“That, kid,” Johnny suddenly appeared next to Mark, startling the latter. He settled one hand on Mark's shoulder, patting it gently. “is what happened if you don't stop denying your feelings.”

"Johnny, stop it!"

Taeyong pulled Johnny away before the latter made Mark went into a rage. Mark just scoffed and stormed off the room.

 

* * *

 

 

Mark knew that he had to talk to Donghyuck and apologized for what he did. But it still took him a whole day to finally have enough courage to approach him. He waited until everyone was fast asleep before he sneaked into Jaehyun and Donghyuck's shared room. He twisted the knob, pushing it open, carefully not making noises. He entered the room and frowned when he found it was vacant. He knew that Jaehyun went out with Taeyong a few hours ago but he was pretty sure that Yuta carried Donghyuck back to his room when the dinner was over. Where was he?

Closing the door behind him, Mark went to the living room to find it empty too. A moment later, he heard a hiss coming from the kitchen and immediately sprinted forward where the sound came from. He gasped when he found Donghyuck leaned against the counter, panting.

“Donghyuck, what are you doing here?”

Mark quickly approached Donghyuck and wrapped his arms around his waist, steadying him. Donghyuck let out a sigh of relief as he leaned against Mark.

“I was thirsty,”

Mark frowned. “You should've called me. I will get you a drink.”

“I'm getting fat. You won't be able to carry me.”

Mark let out a sigh. He knew that Donghyuck wouldn’t let him get away with it so easily. He pressed his lips together as he settled the smaller on the chair. He took a deep breath before dropping on one knee before him, startling Donghyuck with his sudden action. Mark carefully took Donghyuck's hand into his. He waited for the smaller to pull his hand away and when he didn't, Mark let out a sigh of relief. He brought Donghyuck's hand up to his lips, pressing small kisses to his knuckles.

“I'm sorry,” he said earnestly, holding Donghyuck's curious gaze. “For what I said. I didn't mean it. You're not fat. You're healthy and I'm so happy to see your round cheeks again.”

“Is that a compliment?”

Mark chuckled. “Yes, it is. I love seeing your round cheeks.”

Donghyuck pouted.

“It doesn’t look good. Dreamies said I look like a chocoball now.”

“You are, indeed,” Mark agreed, but before Donghyuck could let out another protest, he continued, “A very cute one.”

Mark loved to see the way Donghyuck's cheeks slowly reddened. They turned crimson and it made Donghyuck looked ten times beautiful like that. Not that he wasn't beautiful any other times. It just that Mark loved the fact that he was the one who made Donghyuck looked like that.

The truth was, words weren't that hard for Mark. It always flowed easily from his pen when he wrote his songs. But it always failed him when it came to Donghyuck. It always got stuck on his throat whenever he was with Donghyuck. He couldn't think of anything clever or witty to say. He was having trouble thinking and looking at him at the same time. That was why he always failed to deliver his emotions and feelings to the smaller and it frustrated him too.

“Come on, let's get you to bed. I will carry you.”

Donghyuck looked at Mark warily. “Are you sure?”

Mark pretended to look offended.

“Don't judge a book by its cover,” he said. “I'm not as tall and big as the rest of the members but I am more than capable to carry you.”

Mark picked Donghyuck up and easily carried him bridal style. Donghyuck shrieked, wrapping his arms around Mark's neck. Mark laughed at Donghyuck reaction as he made his way out of the kitchen. He carried the smaller to his room and carefully sat him down on the bed.

“Lift your arms, Donghyuck.”

Donghyuck frowned. “Are you going to dress me up too?”

Mark nodded dumbly.

“I'm not invalid, Mark," he pouted. “I can dress up by myself.”

“I know,” Mark replied nonchalantly as he grabbed a clean T-shirt. “I just want to.”

Donghyuck shook his head. There was a faint blush coloring his cheeks.  

“I'm not going to undress in front of you.”

Mark looked at Donghyuck, his eyes hot and intense.

“Lift your arms, pup. _Now_.” Mark directed in a gentle yet commanding tone.

Donghyuck blushed again at the nickname. He silently obeyed and Mark pulled his sweater off before sliding the T-shirt over his head. He ran his fingers through his hair, combing it with his fingers and arranging it so it fell naturally about his face. Mark smiled as he did it and he accidentally caught Donghyuck's gaze when he looked down. There was a strong urge to lean down and kiss him senseless, to give into temptation, to finally let out everything. But it felt like every time Mark wanted to take a step forward, he always ended up backing down.

“Donghyuck,” Mark started, looking straight into Donghyuck’s eyes.

“Yes?”

_Say it. Say it._

_I love you_. “You’re still heavy.”

A pillow was slapped onto Mark’s face and made him fell to the ground.

 

* * *

 

 

Donghyuck ignored Mark for the next two weeks. He didn't talk to Mark and refused to be on the same space as him. He let the others carry him and take care of him because his leg was still in pain sometimes but he never let Mark go near him. It drove Mark crazy, obviously. He was aware that this time, it wasn't just about what he said that night. He was aware that it was because of something else, something that had been going around them for years now. Contrary to what others believed, Mark wasn't as dense as they thought he was. He was aware of his own feelings but he kept denying it to keep himself sane. He knew that once he let everything out, there was no turning back. He wouldn't be able to hold back.

The concert in Seoul had just ended and it was a perfect opportunity for Mark to talk to Donghyuck. The other members were aware that Mark and Donghyuck weren't on speaking terms right now and they were considerate enough to give them some space.

Later that day, when they came back to the dorm again, Mark caught Donghyuck’s wrist before the smaller could go into his room. Donghyuck didn’t say anything. He simply just raised one of his eyebrows at him, waiting for him to talk first.

“Let’s talk,” Mark said, swallowing thickly. “We need to talk.”

“About me getting fat and heavy?”

Mark sighed, tightening his grip.

“About us.”

Donghyuck stared Mark for a very long moment with his calculating eyes, considering his offer. It took a while before his face slowly softened and he finally nodded.

“Okay,” he said after a loaded moment of silence. “Come to my room. Jaehyunie hyung is with Taeyongie hyung again.”

Mark stepped around Donghyuck and looked at him, silently asking for his permission. This time, Donghyuck didn't hesitate to nod. Mark visibly relaxed as he wrapped his arms around Donghyuck's waist. He picked the smaller up into his arms and carried him to his room. Mark settled Donghyuck on the bed and then got down on his knees in front of him. There were so many things he wanted to say to the smaller. But Mark was afraid that words might fail him again this time and he couldn't afford it. If he fucked up again, the chance would be gone. So instead of talking, Mark would show Donghyuck his feelings.

“Donghyuck,”

Mark took Donghyuck's hand and brought it to his lips, kissing his knuckles gently while holding Donghyuck's gaze. He spread Donghyuck's legs and settled himself in between his thighs, straightening his back so they were face to face now.

What Mark felt to Donghyuck, it wasn't love at first sight. It was closer to love at second sight, if that kind of thing existed. It was the feeling when you meet someone you were going to fall in love with them. You didn't love them right away, but it was inevitable that you would. It was exactly what Mark felt right now. Donghyuck was the constant's presence in his life. His love at second sight, and someone he was going to fall in love with every day.

Mark held Donghyuck’s face gently, as if he was afraid that the smaller was going to break, and then he leaned forward and pressed his lips against Donghyuck’s forehead.

“You’re so beautiful,”

Another kiss to the space between his eyebrows.

“I missed you so damn much when you weren’t here with me,”

Mark trailed his lips down Donghyuck’s nose, kissing his cute button nose twice.

“You make me feel the way love songs say you're supposed to feel,”

Mark kissed both of Donghyuck’s cheeks. He started trailing kisses down his jaw, his neck, and then he stopped there, breathing in and out. Donghyuck always smelled like home to him. He was the one Mark came to when he wanted to seek comfort and reassurance.

“Mark?”

Donghyuck slid his fingers into Mark's hair, cradling the back of his head. Mark hummed in delight.

“Is this how you confessing your love for me?” he teased.

Mark pulled his head away to look at Donghyuck’s face.

“Am I that bad?”

Donghyuck smirked. “Should I tell you the truth?”

Donghyuck grabbed Mark's shoulder and pulled him. Mark didn't resist, and Donghyuck didn't stop pulling until the full lengths of their bodies were touching. He didn't stop pulling until he was in his breathing space.

“That was the worst confession ever,” Donghyuck whispered, his eyes sparkling with mirth.

“I told you I was bad with words,” Mark admitted. “Well, when it comes to you, I suck.”

“You didn't,” Donghyuck played with the back of Mark's hair. “You're just very good with actions.”

“I am?”

“You are,” he told him. “You didn't think that I wouldn’t notice when my favorite sweater was missing? Taeyong hyung checked up on me every day only because you asked him to. When I came back here, there's always food ready for me. I know you were the one who put extra energy bars on my bag. And the green tea ice cream on the fridge? It was definitely you.”

They were so close that Donghyuck could feel the slight heat from Mark's blush. The latter smiled sheepishly.

“Guess I wasn't that stuble,”

Donghyuck chuckled. “You're anything but stuble.”

“Even so, can I kiss you?”

“Say the magic words first.”

Mark let out a deep breath. “I love you.”

Donghyuck grinned.

“Now that wasn’t so hard, wasn’t it?”

“Not really,” Mark said, he was getting impatient now. “So, can I kiss you now?”

“Yes, please.”

Mark put his hand on Donghyuck’s waist and buried his fingers in his hair, pulling him down to crash their lips. Donghyuck lips were like soft pillows and Mark sunk into them. They started out chaste, just lips touching, tasting, learning each other, but soon they couldn't get enough. Donghyuck parted his lips and their tongues tangled and retreated and tangled again. Mark was hard everywhere but it felt too good, too right to be embarrassed about. Donghyuck was making little moaning sounds that made Mark wanted to kiss him even more.

Donghyuck pulled away and Mark made a noise like it hurt.

“Come back here, pup. I wasn’t done kissing you.”

Mark didn't stop kissing Donghyuck. He just couldn't stop. Donghyuck felt Mark's kiss everywhere. From the tips of his hair until the tip of his toes. At this point, there was no part of Donghyuck that wasn't being kissed. When they finally parted and were breathing normally again, Mark kissed the tip of Donghyuck's nose.

“Nose fetishist,” he teased, giggling. “Didn't know that you're into that kind of thing.”

“ _You_ are my fetish.”

Donghyuck burned in flames and Mark smirked in triumphs.

“You're being unfair,”

“How come? I'm just showing you just how much I love you.”

Donghyuck scoffed. “Wow, Mark Lee sure has a way with words.”

Mark ignored the sarcasm and punctuated his words with nose kisses.

“I.”

Kiss.

“Love.”

another kiss.

“You.”

Donghyuck laughed, he was feeling so warm and fuzzy inside.

“All right,” he said. “No more talking. More kissing.”

Donghyuck pulled Mark down and Mark met him halfway. They kissed, and kissed, and kissed again like there was no tomorrow. 

 

* * *

 

**Author's Note:**

> [Twitter](https://twitter.com/_hitmyheart)   
> [Curious Cat](https://curiouscat.me/_hitmyheart)


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